ThrillerFest

AgentFest: You’ve Got Questions, We’ve Got Answers

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Hi, everyone, a delight to meet you. I’m Shane Gericke, your friendly Team Captain, and I’ll be here for you till the end of AgentFest.

It’s a new program, Team Captain. We decided to try it this year to give you a single point of contact to get your questions answered, your fears allayed, and your suggestions passed along. You’re getting this FAQ because you signed up for The Coolest Manuscript Pitching Program on Earth: AgentFest. It’s a fun couple hours of your life, and so exciting that a double shot of mocha renta cappucino will seem tame in comparison. Plus, you might get an agent!

So without further ado . . .

Q. So how come you’re Team Captain? Wasn’t anyone smart available?

A. Are you kidding? The smart kids made me captain when I left the room.  But I’m sincere! And smile a lot. So you’ll be fine.

Q. What exactly is AgentFest?

A. The world’s largest gathering of top literary agents looking for the Next Big Thing.

Q. Really? I can bring my next manuscript and maybe find an agent for it?

A. I kid you not: a number of our authors have gotten representation from this event, and several of their manuscripts have become real, published works. AgentFest, held every year on the Thursday afternoon of ThrillerFest, is designed for authors who want to pitch their work to the more than forty literary agents who volunteered to hear the pitches.

Q. Are these real agents? Or the kind that *say* they’re real but charge me to read my own manuscript and then steer me into vanity presses or self-publishing?

A. Our agents are the genuine real deal. All sell to major publishers around the world, and all are highly respected in the field. I and Kimberley Howe, the assistant executive director of ThrillerFest, can attest to that, as we recruited all of them personally.

Q. Despite that, they’re good?

A. <Sound of raspberries>

Q. Right. Are they taking new clients?

A. Every agent who attends is actively seeking thriller manuscripts, and many are looking for other things in addition: mystery, romance, nonfiction, supernatural, whatever. Check their bios on the website; they spell out what each agent does and doesn’t represent.

Q. When is AgentFest?

A. Thursday, July 12, 2012. Starts at 2 p.m., ends at 4:30 p.m., with a twenty-minute break in the middle.

Q. A buddy who went through it last year says it’s like speed dating. Yes?

A. Yes, except you don’t get kissed. (Unless your name is James Patterson and you’re hunting for a new agent, in which case you might get smooched, and more than once. But normally, no.) Here’s how it works: You sit in front of an agent, pitch and discuss your idea, get a yes, no or “send me some chapters” from the agent, then move to the next agent and make your next pitch. The event runs two hours total.

Q. Two-and-a-half hours? It was three-and-a-half last year. Why an hour less now?

A. To make things easier on everyone. It’s been three-and-a-half hours since the start, but we saw over the years that agents and authors get glassy-eyed after two-and-a-half—pitching and listening are incredibly intense activities. So we trimmed the event by an hour to preserve everyone’s sanity and keep the agents coming back year after year. If agents drop out from exhaustion, this event won’t happen. Ergo . . .

Q. Ergo?

A. It’s Latin for, “Two hours, not three.”

Q. Wow, you are smart! Are the answers to everything I seek on the website?

A. Yep. Everything you need to know about all our events and programming are on  www.thrillerfest.com.

Q. Then why are you writing this?

A. To cover everything that isn’t.

Q. Is there anything besides AgentFest in which I can participate?

A. Glad you asked. In order: CraftFest is Wednesday and Thursday morning. AgentFest is Thursday afternoon. ThrillerFest Opening Night Cocktail Party is Thursday night. ThrillerFest is Friday and Saturday. Thriller Awards Banquet is Saturday night. And then you go home and collapse, smiling about what a great time you just had. But, let’s get back to AgentFest, shall we?

Q. Righto! Do I have to have a full completed manuscript, or can I just pitch the 238 pages I’ve written so far?

A. Having a complete manuscript is not mandatory to participate in AgentFest. But, I suggest you do your darndest to finish it before arriving. Here’s why: If agents like what they see, they want to sign you as a client and sell your book immediately to a publisher. You want that, too. But you can’t sell a book unless it’s finished, right? So, do your best to type THE END. That said, being only partway done is fine.

Q. “Darndest?”

A. Our website is fun for the whole family!

Q. Do you assign me to agents, or do I pick?

A. Who you pitch is entirely up to you. So, over two-and-a-half hours, you should have enough time to pitch a dozen agents, maybe more.

Q. Is this really intense?

A. Like sprinting a marathon. But you won’t need plasma and foot rubs afterwards.

Q. Do I have to stay the whole two-and-a-half hours?

A. Nope. I don’t take attendance. You can stay for one agent, or stay the whole time. It’s entirely up to you. Many authors have their list of six or twelve agents, and when they’re done, they leave. Many more stay till the bitter end. Funny story about that: last year, one of the agents told me he was so drained at the end of the day he couldn’t hear one more pitch. But an author sat and he said, Aw, what the hell. The manuscript was so electrifying he made an offer then and there. That’s not atypical, either. Pitching is a numbers game—the more agents you see, the more likely someone is to say yes.

Q. Are the agents paid to be there?

A. Nope. They’re volunteers. They’re looking for manuscripts to sell to publishers.

Q. Are you paid to be Team Captain?

A. Nope. Like the vast majority of ThrillerFest directors, I’m a thriller author who volunteered to do this.

Q. If everyone’s a volunteer, how come I’m charged to attend?

A. Someone’s gotta pay for the pitch rooms, hotel staff, refreshments, air-conditioning, and keeping the bathrooms fresh and breezy. That would be you, Bunky.

Q.    You say folks have actually gotten representation?

A. Yes. One author who launched his debut thriller in 2010—in hardcover, e-book, audiobook and large type simultaneously—found his agent at AgentFest. Another who got her agent with us in 2010 just sold her book to Random House, with publication set for 2012. Check out the success stories on the website for more. While there’s NO GUARANTEE REAL OR IMPLIED that any agent will like your work—I made that all-caps to impress upon you that you might not get even a single solitary nibble—the opposite is equally true: they may all love your work. Like the Lottery, you can’t win if you don’t play.

Q. And if I don’t place my manuscript with anyone?

A. It’s still an enormously valuable experience. You’ll have met the top agents in the business, gone through the pitching experience, made some valuable contacts, and learned a lot of things about the business. And, you’ll have gotten the inspiration you need to punch up your book and come back next year. All for the folding dollars you would have otherwise blown buying liquor and comic books, right?

Q. Um, they’re called “graphic novels” now.

A. Potato, potahto. I just wish speed-pitching had been around when I broke into the business.

Q. So, how does AgentFest go, exactly?

A. You and your classmates participate in CraftFest on Wednesday and Thursday morning. Then you attend the CraftFest luncheon. At 1:45 p.m., you walk to the rooms where we hold the pitches. (They’ll be familiar—they’re the same rooms where you took CraftFest classes.) There are four rooms, each containing a dozen or so agents. Each agent has a table and two chairs—one for you, one for the agent. They’re spaced along all four walls, in alphabetical order for E-Z finding, with a sign board at each door listing the agents in that room. You will already have decided which agents you want to see, based on their bios contained on this website. (You DID do your pre-pitch prep and figured out who you wanted to see, right???) When the signal is given at 2 p.m., you and your classmates walk into the rooms and find an agent—

Q. Can I run real fast and beat everyone to the front of the line?

A. No. If you break your leg because you were rushing pell-mell, New York paramedics will snicker at you and make jokes. They’re tough that way. So, when I give the signal, you’ll walk into the room, pick your first agent, and head to that table—

Q. And THAT’S when I land my big contract?

A. Mmm, not quite yet. You get into any line you want and wait. At the signal, the first author in line sits in the chair and makes his or her pitch. The agent says yes, no, or send me some chapters to read, then dismisses the author and takes the next in line. Newly freed, you go into another line and make your next pitch.

Q. How long is each pitch?

A. Three minutes.

Q. How will we know when to move to the next line?

A. The agent will tell you. This year, we’re abandoning the public address system we’ve used to announce the three-minute marks. Instead, we’re giving the agents three-minute timers and having them manage their own schedules.

Q. Why the change?

A. Because some agents can say yes or no in fifteen seconds, and thus hear more pitches in the two-and-a-half-hour event. Others require a minute, still others, three or four minutes. Each book idea is unique, so we decided to let the agents manage their own time clocks this year. That also means no public address system blaring in your ear every three minutes. It’s yet another way to keep the noise down.

Q. Noise? Will I be able to hear?

A. Yes. If everyone does their part and doesn’t talk other than while pitching, you’ll hear loud and clear.

Q. But what if I can’t? What if I have to cup my ear like great-grandpa and—

A. Please, don’t worry about any of this. Just relax, and concentrate on having a lively  discussion with the agents. They’ll let you know when they’re finished, and if they want anything further from you.

Q. Why should I believe you? What’s your expertise?

A. I’ve been a national bestselling thriller author since 2006, and before that, a veteran  newspaper editor. I’ve helped run this festival since it began: chairman of ThrillerFest, deputy chairman, director of AgentFest, director of Charity Auctions, and other things big and small, including hauling cases of books to the Barnes & Noble bookroom. Plus, as I mentioned, I smile a lot. I won’t steer you wrong.

Q. I’m convinced. How do I contact you?

A. Drop me an e-mail at shane@shanegericke.com. I’m also on Facebook, under Shane Gericke. I’ll be at ThrillerFest starting Tuesday, so if you need something on-site, don’t hesitate to hunt me down like a rabid dog.

Q. Any such thing as a stupid question?

A. Nope. I’ve asked them all myself at one time or another. Now it’s your turn.

Q. Cool! Should I have a stack of manuscripts in case an agent wants one?

A. No. Keep your manuscripts in your hotel room, or back at home. The agents will ask you to send one via mail or Internet if they’re interested. They don’t want to haul a hundred pounds of manuscripts on the subway when the day is over.

Q. How about business cards?

A. Always a good idea to have business cards with you. They’ll ask if they want one. Make sure your contact information is prominent, especially e-mail. You DO have e-mail, right? If not, get it. Now. That’s your prime means of communication with everyone in this business, since we’re spread across the world. You can get cards printed online, or at a local print shop like Kinko’s or OfficeMax. Two online shops I’ve used with great success: www.iconix.biz and www.vistaprint.com.

Q. Should I have a website?

A. Not needed at all for pitching. But you should have one anyway, so people can find you easily. Two good places to reserve web names: www.networksolutions.com and www.godaddy.com. If you’re not ready to build a website, at least reserve the domain name you’ll want to use as a writer. That way it’s there when you’re ready to unveil yourself to the digital world.

Q. So, pitches go till the midway break?

A. Yes, straight through, one after the next. You will pitch, move, pitch, move. Then you take a break at the halfway point, than get back to pitching again.

Q. Can I hop lines if mine is too long?

A. Absolutely. If your agent line is long and you see a short one, feel free to move over. Pitching agents is a numbers game: the more you talk to, the likelier you are to find one who wants what you’re selling. By all means, have your list of agents you want to talk to. But try the others, too. You never know who’s gonna love your work so much they’ll get into fistfights to sign you. Only one rule for the lines: no cutsies. You go to the back of the line.

Q. What happens during the twenty-minute break?

A. You relax, hit the bathroom, check e-mail, Twitter your thoughts, whatever. Some agents will keep hearing pitches. Take advantage if you want.

Q. Can I go to the bathroom during the pitches, or do I have to wait till the break?

A. Time and tides wait for nobody, so the minute your lunchtime refreshment starts pounding your bladder, get thee to the bathroom forthwith. When you come back to the room all refreshed, join a new line. Remember: no cutsies.

Q. My buddy who attended in 2009 said he followed an agent into the bathroom and shoved his manuscript under the stall while the guy was. . . well, you know. That was so clever, like they’d do in the movies! Should I try that?

A. Um, no. Everyone deserves a little private time.  So, leave the agents alone in the bathrooms. The career you save may be your own.

Q. After the break, what happens?

A. Same as before the break: pitches, pitches, pitches till the end.

Q. Can I practice my pitch while I’m in line?

A. No.

Q. Meanie.

A. Yes. But for a good reason: every room will contain more than 50 people at any given moment, simultaneously hearing and making pitches. That’s a lot of noise, and the rooms don’t need more. If you want to talk, please go into the hall. When you’re sitting in that pitch chair and can hear the agent saying clearly, “I love this idea! Can you overnight me the manuscript?” you’ll thank me.

Q. Will you be there during AgentFest in case I have questions?

A. Yep. I’ll be there in person, the whole time, guzzling coffee. Ask me anything.

Q. What happens when it’s over?

A. You go on your merry way. Or, better, attend the “Buzz Your Book” program that starts immediately afterward. It’s presented by M.J. Rose and Douglas Clegg, two of the hottest book marketers (and hella good authors too) in the industry. It’s included in the price of CraftFest and AgentFest, so attend: after all, you paid for it. There’s terrific information to be had about getting you and your work noticed. You won’t want to miss this opportunity to learn how to get the word of your great new novel out to the whole world.

Q. Can I sign up ONLY for AgentFest? You know, fly in Thursday morning and fly home Thursday night?

A. No. In order to attend AgentFest, you must also sign up for CraftFest. They’re joined at the hip. You don’t have to do AgentFest to do CraftFest, but you must do CraftFest to do AgentFest.

Q. How come?

A. Because our agents’ time is valuable, and we won’t waste it on authors treating the pitching system as some kind of lark or joke. Don’t laugh; it happens. Requiring CraftFest helps ensure that only authors making a serious commitment to their craft will get into the rooms, and that gives everyone a better experience. After all, if the agents quit coming cause the quality of pitching stinks, they’ll never hear your great idea.

Q. I’ve never made a book pitch? Will I learn how to pitch at CraftFest?

A. Yes, that’s one of the goals: teaching you how to present your work to agents and editors, and close the sale with them. We provide a full presentation on effective pitching during CraftFest.

Q. What should I wear for the pitches? Suit and tie? Heels? Rented tux?

A. I recommend business casual. There’s no dress code, so you can wear cutoffs and a lime “Hello, Kitty” T-shirt for all I care. But consider that you’re trying to sell your work to major literary agents. You want them to take you seriously? Then dress like you respect them. That’s why I recommend nice business casual. Blazers? Fine, but not necessary. Dresses and full suit-with-tie? Pretty, but won’t give you any particular edge over business casual, and will be far less comfortable. Tux? Only if you’re getting married afterwards. Shoes? Yes. Make them sensible.

Q. Sensible shoes? I gotta wear sensible shoes at AgentFest? When I just spent a ton on these leopard skin—

A. You’re gonna be on your feet a long time. Do yourself a favor and skip the ladykiller/mankiller shoes during working hours. Save them for the cocktail parties, where everyone’s puttin’ on their Ritz. Besides, you’d hate to scuff those leopards when some clumsy fool steps on your foot during AgentFest. I’d apologize, but still, you’d have the scuff …

Q. Should I thank the agents? Or will they think I’m a cheese-eating suckup?

A. By all means, YES, thank them, and sincerely. Everyone likes to feel appreciated, and they are going waaaaay out of their way to help you sell your book. They could just as easily stay in their offices and work.

Q. Should I thank you?

A. Hell no, you cheese-eating suckup, you.

Q. What else I should know?

A. Can’t think of anything. But something might occur to you later on. Drop me a line at shane@shanegericke.com, or fine me at Shane Gericke on Facebook, if you have further questions or comments.

Q. Hey, this was fun. You’re not nearly as big a jerk as everyone says.

A. Thanks. I think.

HOW TO CONTACT SHANE!

For questions, comments and the address to send him stacks of unmarked twenty-dollar bills, contact Shane at shane@shanegericke.com, or at Shane Gericke on Facebook.